Man v/s Women

                                    Girls and boys think differently Mike you know that. Mike responded, “She need not break up with me for such a small reason Steffi.”  Steffi rolling her eyes, “Listen bro I spoke to Stella she told me all about your date how it all went.”  Mike’s face just dropped, “you know she is the first women I ever dated it’s so complicated to talk to her and keep up with her mood swings and all.” (Steffi was trying to educate her little brother Mike on how women are totally different from men. Mike is dating Steffi’s best friend Stella) Well bro I spoke to her for six hours straight last night. She elaborately explained every moment of your big one month anniversary date night and what a big flop show it was. Mike completely outraged, “You spoke for six hours are you gone nut’s Steffi????" Mike knew women love discussing nitty gritty details about every incident that occurs in their life but elaborate six hours explanation of a date which lasted for only two hours was really horrifying and painfully shocking. Trying to not sound heartless git Mike looked into Steffi’s eye and said politely, “My sweet sis I think you and your bestie are going insane.”  Taking a deep breath Steffi answered listen all chicks are going to behave this way so you need a permanent solution to your problem.  I will try to help you understand with a bullet point presentation on what all went wrong with yesterday’s date.

                                      Mike was in no mood for a bullet point presentation on how he screwed up his first month anniversary date night with the only chick who agreed to date him after half a dozen chicks had rejected him miserably.  So he says “Sis I appreciate your effort but it would be sweet if you just give me a one line explanation of what am I suppose to do now?” Steffi felt bad that Mike was not interested in her power point explanation so she said with a heavy heart, “Fine I will give you a brief summary. Firstly you forgot it was your one month anniversary and did not bother to wait till 12 A.M. to wish her. She was thinking you would bring flowers or cake or some gift and stand below her balcony playing the guitar.” Mike utterly bewildered, “Are you crazy how could I go with flowers and guitar that night, you know it was Arsenal’s final match dude.”  Steffi was totally dumbfounded she fumbled, “Guys and their football fetish DAM them.”  Mike spoke, “Even if I could make it after the match Mr. Chadda would kill me he has told me not to loiter in that area after nine.” “Oh bollocks Mike you always roam around all night long with your dear hippy friends playing guitar”, Steffi sounding totally agitated.  Even if you screwed up at night you called her next day in the afternoon that also to ask her if she had your earphones and that poor soul could not take it any more she reminded you about the anniversary. Mike spoke out loud, “what a drama queen, that hopeless git took my new skull candy earphones for entire week and did not have the cheek to return them in the first place. When I asked her about them she changed the topic to our first month anniversary waste like her. Still she has not returned those new skull candy ear phones and she wants to break up with me. I won’t let her have those ear phones. “Mike you really don’t get her do you she had taken your earphones to engrave on them her and your initials M&S. She wanted to gift you customized earphones with your initial on them.” Mike was seriously shocked he did not know how to react on this bit of information.

                                    Mike I know you are thinking that you took her to Balaji Cheese Dosa corner for the date as it was the first place you both meet.  Mike was relieved to hear this as he had no idea this was the place he had first time meet Stella. He took her there because this place was near his house and economically feasible. He also remembered that Stella always likes coming to this place and hogging the cheesy Mysore Dosa. Steffi abruptly interrupted Mike’s deep thoughts saying,” Mike Stella thought that you were going to take her to some place much more elegant and less shady after all she wore her Christmas dress and brand new heels”.  Mike responded with a strange expression on his face, “Sis I did compliment her and took dairy milk silk also for her. After all that I gave her a sweet little kissy also on her cheek”.  Steffi really had no idea how to react to that feeling embarrassed she replied, “Yes I know but you never went to reach her home??”  Mike defensively, “she said she will manage to go by herself so when my building came I got off the rickshaw.” Steffi trying to be nice understanding sister, “Sweetie when she said she does not want to be dropped she is just saying it to see if you care for her.”  Mike said in anger how can she judge how much I care when she specifically said no I do not want you to reach me home I can manage.  Steffi replied, “Girls say they don’t want to be taken care off but deep within they want you to take the decision to take care of them”. “How am I suppose to know what she wants, if she tells me one thing and wants me to do the opposite of it. This is totally insane dude why are you all so messed up, just tell what you think and everything will be so easy and less messed up”, Mike with an angry grim face. Suddenly the door bell rang and Adrian called mike to play basketball. Mike looked at Steffi, “I am going to play I will talk to Stella later”.  Steffi knew in her heart Stella was waiting near the cell phone leaving all her work aside just to hear Mike’s apology.  Mike on the other hand had just left to go and play basket ball with his hippy friends. Steffi also knew when Mike would call up after the game and apologise to Stella, she would forgive him and things would go back to how it was this was the universal cycle of man v/s women saga.